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United Oil Co Inc

January 20, 2014 @ 10:45 PM - January 21, 2014 @ 12:45 AM

Mercy is the mark of a great man. Guess I’m just a good man. Well, I’m all right. Ten percent of nothin’ is … let me do the math here … nothin’ into nothin’ … carry the nothin’ … Oh, I think you might wanna reconsider that last part. See, I married me a powerful ugly creature. If anyone gets nosy, just …you know … shoot ’em. Shoot ’em? Politely, of course. Man walks down the street in a hat like that, you know he’s not afraid of anything. Yes sir, Captain Tightpants!
Psychic, though? That sounds like something out of science fiction. We live in a spaceship, dear. I cannot abide useless people. I swear by my pretty floral bonnet, I will end you. Course you couldn’t buy an invite with a diamond the size of a testicle, but I got my hands on a couple. How did your brain even learn human speech? Just get us on the ground! That part will happen pretty definitely! Am I a lion? I don’t think of myself as a lion. You might as well, though, I have a mighty roar.

You know what the chain of command is? It’s the chain I go get and beat you with until you understand who’s in ruttin charge here. Let’s go be bad guys! Man walks down the street in a hat like that, you know he’s not afraid of anything. I swear by my pretty floral bonnet, I will end you. Oh, I think you might wanna reconsider that last part. See, I married me a powerful ugly creature. Here lies my beloved Zoe, my autumn flower … somewhat less attractive now that she’s all corpsified and gross. Yes sir, Captain Tightpants!

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Start:
January 20, 2014 @ 10:45 PM
End:
January 21, 2014 @ 12:45 AM
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